((Mowtown)),

This is why I found a great need to "clarify" in another thread here about "real PTSD" or complex PTSD and what it means verses a personality disorder. When I read about you Mowtown I see "stress" and how you are looking at the way you are challenged as a form of "entrapment" and unfortunately you are also exposed to others who tend to be "ignorantly" judgemental as well.

A person doesn't all of a sudden "just become bipolar" Mowtown. You are not dealing with bipolar, you are dealing with a "stress breakdown" and when you are stressed, which you are right now, you experience a PTSD cycle. Post Traumatic STRESS disorder Mowtown. And PTSD has symptoms that include difficulty sleeping and self blaming and feeling depressed as well as being "confused" too. These are all "stress related" and has nothing to do with other mental health problems/disorders.

You have been working at "self helping" in positive and proactive ways Mowtown. However, you also have some stressful things you are working through too, that is going to aggrivate the PTSD as well as feeling "guilt and shame", but that is "normal" for anyone who is stressed, it is just a lot harder for someone who is struggling with PTSD.

I think you are "stuck" in confusion right now which is only adding more stress and that is not good for you. You are doing all the right things right now to "reduce" the stress you are under, so you have to be "patient" and do your best to "not add fuel to the stress" because it will only make you feel worse. You will make "gains" if you keep your focus on doing what you need to do to "reduce" stress which includes your unknowingly feeding into creating more stress. Right now you are being a "survivor" and there is nothing wrong with that, many prominent people have had to do "damage control" and dig themselves out of bad situations, you have done this before and you, like others can do this again too.