almeda, for me, "boundaries" is not a negative, but something I need to learn to set better for myself. We talk about this in therapy a lot. My T says I do not set boundaries well and so people walk all over me. True, I guess. I feel like I do set boundaries, but people still walk over them. I don't know how to get people to not walk over my boundaries? It really is a huge puzzle to me. My T has boundaries too, but they are not a negative, just something to keep both him and me safe. If I cross them, I would expect him to tell me, and then I would back off. What I don't get is why when I set boundaries and people cross them, they don't back off when I tell them? Sigh...