itsjustme...

I posted this in the temporary forum as a reply to your post there:
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itsjustme

I understand all of the roadblocks and I understand how hard it is making this. It is horrible to have no one around to help (I am in the same boat, but all I have to worry about is myself... no responsibilities like dependant children).

You really really need an advocate to help you with this. From what you have said, you really trust your T and she seems to make the effort to help. Or your doctor or someone else who is currently working with you. I think your T already knows the whole situation. Let her either help or find someone with the resources... social worker or lawyer or something, to help you with this.

Most strongly I urge you NOT to lie to the doctor when you talk to him. What good will that do? Push you further and further down the hole until you loose your children by being unable to take care of them. You HAVE to take care of yourself to take care of them. The doc has already demonstrated that he understands your situation and will work with you and around your schedule as much as he can. He is in your service, but you do have to show him some "good faith" activity on your part that you will work hard to make this happen.

Just a possible suggestion. Talk to the doc, tell him the truth. Don't set up another hospital appointment, but tell him that you want to set up with the hospital but will make sure first that there won't be any more holdups, and promise him you will keep in touch and let him know when he can make firm plans.

Then talk to your T and get her advice on solving the problem with your kids. You have already been through some court services so maybe you have some objective contacts there. A social worker. Family services. Lawyer. Anything. Get someone with some legal pull to mediate this. Make a court order that he has to take the kids so that you can get medical treatment that you have been putting off because of him. Have someone from social services pick up the kids and drop them at your ex's and say here, they are yours for the next week, as per your agreement.

Explain to your advocate that there are court proceedings pending that you have had to postpone because you must solve your medical problem first. You have already been forced to postpone them once already, and now you are postponing your SCHEDULED MEDICAL TREATMENT because you ex has broken his promise and is shurking HIS responsibility. That is making YOU look bad in the court's eyes, but you WANT to get the court date rescheduled but it is your EX that is holding you up.

You can not worry about what they will think regarding mental illness. Taking these steps will show them that you are RESPONSIBLE and CAPABLE, that you are not going to the hospital because you are "out of control." This is a scheduled hospital stay that is required for regulating the meds that you need to keep you functioning properly. If they are going to look at that negatively, you can't worry about that. I can guarantee that they will look at having a breakdown negatively, and you admit that is where you are headed. Even without a breakdown, they are going to look at postponing treatment that you need negatively, and at this point I think it is a good bet that that is what your ex is up to... to manupulate you into postponing your treatment so that they can show up in court and say "see she isn't even taking care of herself."

itsjustme please do this. Do what you have to, but don't think that submitting to your ex's manipulation is what you "have to." Take back control.

{{{{{{{{itsjustme}}}}}}}}

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