This is my first post and i'm not completely sure how to word it so I think this will be short. Just in case, some background on me is that i'm a 16 year old male.

Basically i just want to figure out whats going on (in my mind, that is) so I can try to figure out how to cope with it. I'll start off with saying that i don't necessarily feel depressed (although since i've never truly acknowledged feeling it and that coupled with the fact that I don't actually know what it feels like, I could have been feeling it all along). Also, there aren't really any external stimuli that would bring me down in any way. I have a great life with great friends and it couldn't seem that things could physically be any better for me, but mentally things seem to be going wrong somehow. So, over the last few years i've just been feeling down. Things that used to make me happy don't make me happy anymore and it seems that spending time with other humans for more than minutes at a time just drains everything out of me. Also, I don't seem to really have any emotions any more and on top of that I've become very judging of myself and, although I would never actually commit suicide because I just couldn't every bring myself to do that and I would want to hurt everyone else around me, I think about suicide... A LOT. I'm talking like on average 3-4 times a day and with some days spiking much higher than that. I just imagine myself dying and the ways I could kill myself with whats around me, but like I said I'd never actually do it.

Can anyone help me out with figuring out whats wrong? With everything I have I should be extremely happy, but instead i'm just null, for lack of a better term, and always thinking about my death and how it could come sooner than later. Is this just due to some chemical imbalance in my mind that was inevitable, or what? Thanks for whoever answers.