Thanks for your responses. I guess what is tough about this too is that we really don't have the money to hire someone. I'm a sahm and that's what we can afford. If I were to get a job, it'd be to pay for child care... and we'd be in the red.
My sister-in-laws both have money. One especially so. I know they need help just like me, but they can afford to hire help... we can't. Just the situation right now. My mother-in-law drives an hour out to her daughters twice a week to watch her grandkids.
Us being 5 minutes away and not having any help from her is tough. I'd love to be able to take some time for myself to calm down, reset. Sometimes I can do that during a nap but most often I'm trying to get important stuff done that I can't do around a toddler.
I'm at my breaking point. I really just need a couple hours a week. I'll even take it once a month.
Her not helping us makes me feel like I'm not really part of the family. It's not like we haven't asked. She's usually doing something and books herself out for months.
Maybe if I didn't just get side lined with starting EMDR (too much too soon) I'd be able to handle running after my kid a bit better.
I just want to be a good mom. How can you be a good mom when you can't even take care of yourself?
(Sorry this is a bit all over the place.)