It's not silly at all! I've had my dog, Shadow, for 13 years. The past 10 years of my life have been really difficult. (see my other post in this same forum). She has been the only constant friend - unconditional love- in my life for a decade. I just found out a month ago that she has cancer and they said she would only be around for 6 to 8 weeks then. I'm just trying to keep her happy for now, which is hard to do since dogs can sense what their owner's are feeling.
I am so sorry for you loss, and that you were not told about it until later.