No Mowtown, you are experiencing normal PTSD symptoms. You have some significant concerns and you were traumatized and confused when your onset of PTS took place in which you experienced a "stress breakdown".

((Mowtown)), you have some very "stressful" things taking place in your life right now, and you suffer from PTSD. It is important that you understand that when someone struggles with PTSD, they tend to "self blame" and even feel many of the things you have discussed. You have been feeding into the stress too much, which you really need to step back from. You are "not" delusional, you are under stress and have to slow down and take this one day at a time.

Hun, I have struggled with many of the symptoms you have been discribing and as you know I have also been under stress myself in my own situation. Yes, some days are damn hard, so you have to slow down and continue to do your best to not feed into the stress that is in your life right now. You are just "afraid" right now, that is "normal" Mowtown, I have dealt with that myself, not your fault and no, you are not a criminal either.

You need to stop looking for something else to add to your plate, you have typical PTSD symtoms, and you know what, these symptoms are challenging enough, no need to add to them.