Your story and mine are almost identical. I have been married for nine years and have a five year old son. Bipolar I here, addiction after addiction. pornography included. Kicked the pain killers 7 years ago and haven't had a drop of alcohol in a almost a year now. But I still pull my hair, smoke, have a horrible caffeine addiction and a few others. The rest of the story almost mimics my life. Me wanting to leave after a manic episode to her having a miscarriage. But after that it was another manic episode for me. We spent 3 years in counseling and things are finally improving for us. I still see help every week on my own. Hope things improve. Keep it together man. At least for your son.