(((((((((((((((Sister))))))))))))))
I know how difficult transference can be too. Writing a letter is actually a really good idea, and what you wrote above was very well written - you sound like such a sweet person.
I'm happy to hear that you feel your relationship with your T is growing, although i do understand the complications with sustaining those relationships - as well as the anxiety that comes along with it. I guess all you can do is trust the person, and in your case, a T sounds like a very reliable person to do this with.
I hope that you are able to share all of this when you see your T next ..
Take good care,
Jacq