Your personal POWER will be shown in ending it..PERIOD!!
You don't need to involve the wife at all. This man needs the lesson you will provide by showing your self-worth and stopping it abruptly and without further contact. He hasn't shown you the consideration or caring you deserve, and by stopping all contact, he will be left to examine his own behavior.
No need to make him suffer further...He will suffer, but because he's a cad! His wife will eventually find out who she's married to without your help!
Patty