you are you just a different you....

I tend to say the old me died that day and a new me was born - in the beginning she was angry, frustrated, anxious, depressed, triggery.....
emotions either over running me and over whelming me - or no emotions whatso ever - so numb nothing touched me ....

Since then over the last nine years - I have worked hard .....and not worked at all lol on the aspects of me i wanted back, depending what part of that PTSD cycle i was on .

patience , kindness, happy go lucky...these words i had to relearn and am still getting to learn......
wow i sound like a pain and i prob was and prob still am when triggered - i feel like a land mine - one wrong step and BOOM! but wiht time and work it has become less... i hope.

So for me - wiht memories of my past that came back and destroyed the past i had made up for myself as a child - I cannot be that same person

we are changed by what happens to us - good or bad things.... we grow we evolve - just as we did to get where we were before PTSD came to play -

You are still you - new and improved in the end maybe who knows