Thanks everyone for the responses The point about the internet research is very true and that is what worries me the most about getting help bc ik it can warp your perception. This is what kept me from seeking help until going through the same feelings over and over again, bc I didn't want to be dramatic or anything. But at the same time I barely knew what bipolar meant until after my first time of feeling "manic" when coming down off the high and realizing something was totally off with me. So I was feeling the symptoms long before I had even known what they were. I will definitely be seeing the doctor soon as lately I've unfortunately been facing another severe wave of depression. I'll keep the advice of staying completely honest and not focus on any specific 'diagnosis' when talking to my doctor. Once again, thanks for all the support and advice