Thanks for the responses everyone...I did recently make a med change (from zyprexa to saphris, plus going off prozac entirely) so that may be it. Though I started having problems before the med change but they've gotten worse.

I think I'm in a mixed state. Manic and depressed at the same time. I finally got ahold of my pdoc yesterday; he told me to double the saphris. He also wanted to add in another antidepressant but I told him no way. Would have just destabilized me more, given how my mood has been. Sometimes I wonder if he knows what he is doing. :roll eyes:

I do feel a little better on the higher dose of saphris, but that might be because I'm too drugged to feel any emotions. I'm staying home from school today; I only had one class, and I decided to skip it because a). I won't be able to focus on it anyway (and I may be able to get some studying done here at home), b). yesterday I was thinking of jumping off the parking garage at school (it's 6 stories up) and I really don't need that kind of temptation, and c). I need a break. I'm trying to have compassion on myself, but it is hard. I really feel like I should go to class. This is such a change from college, where I skipped all the time, haha. Probably a good thing that I'm developing a stronger work ethic. I decided that if the sui thoughts come back I'll go to the ER. I found out yesterday that we have a psych ER close to my house. So if I can't handle it today, I'll go.