Aww, this post almost made me cry, a bit. My eyes were watery - then, there was a distraction, Dad came looking for some nails, pushing away the gym equipment in my immediate space... and it stopped the process! This makes me hopeful I could 'distract' myself with physical actions/looking away and watching something maybe? It was unexpected, I didn't know what was going on, and it stopped me in the tracks!

In the situation with my friend, it stopped me that I thought 'Oh she doesn't know what to talk about, she doesn't mean any harm, she's just talking....' Then, she said something that really hurt me and tears just came. She said, 'You hurt your mother so much...' (and continued 'your Dad hurt her so much too... that she is now less critical and way more accepting.' So it was an overall positive statement. But I don't go around telling friends they hurt their mothers so much!! She then went on how she hurt her mother so much too, and that kids/daughters hurt mums, 'it's the way things are' and she was just 'such is life' and I was just crying. Because I disagree, such is not life, not all kids hurt parents 'so much', and I was feeling guilty about something like that before already... She said before that my mother looks so 'aged' and I felt guilty even then...) Looking back, it does seem like I cried 'over nothing', but I'm also glad this friend and I 'talked'/texted and clarified some things.

Yeah, I was aware of the concept of HSP. I haven't actually read any of the books, just information online. Thanks for posting the list of books - didn't know there were so many! A bit hard to choose, and I've been a bit strapped for money...

I mostly don't cry with my parents anymore, or maybe very rarely. Haven't since the diagnosis. We get along much better than we used to since my diagnosis, they are more accepting and I adapted to them a bit too.

Yelling does get me upset, I've had 'hyperacusis' (noise/sound sensitivity) for a few years now too, it started at my teaching job in a time of stress, then it was okay, a few years later it went way worse... I've tried to stay away or leave into another room if other people yelled at each other or were loud.
When people yelled/expressed extremely negative feelings out loud I've been extremely uncomfortable too.

I got yelled at growing up a bit, mum yelled at dad (a lot, not very loudly, but with criticism and 'nagging', she has had high standards and he is fast but not so precise, they had differences because of religion and upbringing of kids and because dad was away from home a lot etc.)

Dad would sometimes go into 'tank' mode and mum was a 'granate' (if you read Dealing with Difficult People by R. Kirschner and R. Brinkman, that book was quite helpful too). So I learnt to deal with my parents somehow, it hasn't been so easy with other people though, especially if they got me 'unexpectedly' or I thought injustice was being done to me, and if I felt somewhat guilty alongside it all.

Thanks for listening!