I do want better.

My life is a mess and a string of disappointment and I don't see any way out. I can't tell how I'll feel from one day to the next and the monster inside my head never rests.

I can't live life like this and at least this way I can choose to feel ok even if it's only for a while.

Medication for this has failed me and I can't do the same meds again. I just can't.