Roberta,

This might be an unusual idea but your brother's move got me thinking...

...they say that learning a foreign language is the best exercise for the brain, and, say, taking up a foreign language is way more helpful than doing crossword puzzles to prevent dementia

...say, if you learn Spanish, here is what will be happening on the positive side:

- your mind will be focused and occupied, and you will be less likely to fall into your old B&W thinking patterns

- your brain will get a good exercise, and that just cannot hurt, right?

- you will be able to read excellent books, because the Spanish literary canon is very rich

- if you visit your brother, you will be able to practice speaking with native speakers (not that there aren't any in Florida )

- most importantly, it will be a new start and you will be doing things from scratch. Maybe when you read in Spanish, which you will have learned being your current, adult, mature, evolved, introspective self, you will be free from the B&W thinking that you absorbed as a child IN ENGLISH!

This is a just a wild guess, of course. The idea is that you will give yourself a fresh start in a new language.