that was one of my "tricks" when I was suicidal for so long. I used to have to trick myself into staying alive. to do this, I would tell myself that it was ok to commit suicide...im DID and I have an alter that wanted to kill me, always plotting my death. to shut her up I would say it was ok, she could do it but we had to wait till x date and usually the depressive episode had passed by then or one of the things I would make sure to do was make commitments to do things for others so when that date came I could say, we cant kill ourself now, we have to put it off until we help so and so with what we promised. it worked every time.