The only thing I'm able to enjoy is when I make my best friend or my sister smile. This means that I go shopping just for them, and I'll spend hours picking out one gift or another (or contemplating which bar of chocolate I'll bring my sister this time).

The downside is that I spend all my pocket money on other people.

But I feel so guilty all the time and when I give my sister or best friend a gift and they smile, so I've made them smile!!, I feel less guilty for a few seconds and that's kind of great.