I believe some people are just downright, mean! Breaking up stinks, but character assassinations on top of it, says much about the other person. Sometimes, in breakups, it's easier to mudsling than to own up to the truth. He didn't have someone on the side, did he? Mainly ask, because sounds like a typical of that style of breakup, deflect from the truth type of tearing down of the broken hearted.

That said, Ive found with men, is that if I try to chameleon myself to them, they repel like magnets would. Plus, in just taking the mentality of love me as I am, or don't waste my time, works better in the long run. Not saying to be inflexible and uncompromising, just being yourself prevents being treated like a doormat.