Yes, I believe it is possible to change your attachment style. I used to be in the very high spectrum of "fearful-avoidant." I would sometimes literally push people away if they got close to me. In terms of affection, I was able to be close... but in terms of opening up my mind and soul... sharing my past... Not so much.

But six months ago, I met a wonderful girl who started to change all of that for me. She's patient, and kind, and understanding, and open. And for the first time I don't feel afraid opening up to a person. She's taught me to trust people, and with the help of my therapist, I've learned to trust myself.

I just took the attachment quiz about a minute ago, and now I rank pretty high on the "secure" spectrum. I didn't think it was possible, but when I look back, so much has changed.

The best way I can describe my relationship with my girlfriend is "I feel like we grow together, not grow apart." Where as past relationships definitely "grow apart" I feel like we are both maturing together, and we have an atmosphere in our relationship that allows each other to make mistakes and grow too.

I think this is the ideal kind of relationship that anyone with mental illness needs. Or any person, really. A relationship without judgement and fear. And I never thought it was possible before we met. I've never known or seen another relationship like ours.

So yes, I believe it's possible to change. But it takes a lot of work from yourself, and also a lot of the right conditions. Because you can't just learn to open up and trust people by yourself. Especially if there is no one worth trusting in your life. You actually have to surround yourself with good people too, which isn't always easy to find. Shoot, it took me 24 years.