I agree, mixed episodes can be different for everyone, so it's great to see how some are effected by it here! I'm not sure if I get mixed or rapid cycling, but I can go from depressed to ecstatic, doesn't have to be hypomanic tho some times I guess it is. My depression is weird. I can feel really very low, alone, worthless, helpless, even suicidal one minute, and a few minutes later feel great. When ever I go down, it feels like a piercing knife in my stomach. Because I don't know how bad it will get. Some times it's followed by extreme anxiety. If I was not on meds, I would have explosive anger and rage. Even when I am pretty stable and around baseline, my moods vary more then average but not as bad without meds. Often I say to myself "I hate my life!" "I should just die!" and later on be totally happy. It sickens me to know I am like this.