Been there, done that- and it sounds just like my ex... we will all have weak moments of internet stalking, but seriously promise yourself no more. I had to delete my FB and SWEAR to myself that I would never search him or anything to do with him ever again because we can say we don't care, but once we find or see something that gets our stomach in knots- it's all over and those emotions come rushing back. Out of sight, out of mind- it really works. Make it a habit not to, and to try to remove any thoughts of him (slowly, because healthy healing process involves dealing with and feeling your feelings and emotions). I like the quote, "Act on knowledge, not feelings; feeling will follow your actions." Basically, try to forget those "feelings" you had for them, own them and know they were real and true, but just remember the knowledge you have of who he really is and the not so good things he did to you, once you start doing that, and acting on the knowldege you have versus the feelings you HAD, your feelings will match...if that makes sense!

I swear, you could be talking about my ex if it makes you feel any better... these types of people lack the ability to have a real, true, emotional bond or connection with people. It is sad and unfortunate for them, so start by feeling sorry that he will never feel the love you felt, and he probably will never know what that feeling is. It is hard for us because we really loved them, and it seems as though we meant nothing to them. Nobody means anything to these types of people, they look at others as an extension of themselves and when you don't serve a purpose for them anymore, or don't act as they would, we are cut off... they sweep in fast so that we miss the red flags that are right in front of us, its how they roll. Sweep us off our feet before we can let our instintcs and intuitions tell us to run the other way, then before we know it we are in love. We are in love with them, but they are in love with the first feelings of being in love, an ego boost, in love with filling the void that exists within themselves. Always remember if someone treats you poorly or not in a way that is respectful it is not a reflection of you but a reflection of THEIR CHARACTER, they are flawed. You did nothing wrong The only thing we need to do is make sure our radars are on and we are listening to our instintcs. I am sure it was the same with you as it was with me, but my gut was screaming at me to run, something didn't add up and was unsettling but I brushed it aside because he was a prince charming. Speeding through the dating and discovery phase of getting to know one another is a huge red flag. Hugs!