On/off relationships can be really addictive. The highs and lows you describe remind me of some of the bad relationships I've had in the past. When it's good, it's really, really good, and when it's bad, it's awful.

There is a better life out there when you step away from the drama. It takes a lot of willpower to do it, but it is better in the long run, in my opinion. The first few guys you date after this one might seem boring in comparison, but sooner or later you will find someone who is exciting, fulfilling, AND who treats you right, without all the crazymaking behavior and put downs.