Thank you for all your kind and caring messages. For some reason I didn't receive any notifications come through to my email address so i wasn't aware of your heartfelt messages. Yes Nicole now i've been betrayed by two men or three if you count my father. I feel shell shocked and cant think straight. At the moment its though i cannot for the life of me string two words together to form a sentence. My brain is totally shot and i have trouble remembering things, just everyday things. My Borderline disorder doesnt help matters. My thoughts and emotions are all over the place. First my therapist and now out of nowhere my husband of 20 years tells me wants to divorce me If my husband cannot understand that to a certain extent i wasnt to blame then good riddance to him too.. I never went out intentionally looking for sex. It was my depraved deviant of a therapist who preyed on me and knew exactly what made me tick. I trusted him with my entire life and he took that trust and abused it and used for his own perverted self serving reasons. Of course he would have known that what he did to me would have devistating after effects on my well being but he didnt care. He did the same thing to at least another 3 women and probably many more, just that they havent come out and said anything. If my husband blames me for what happened he is the one with the problem not me. Oh incidentally he made sure to bleed my dry of every cent that i had before he asked for a divorce. Makes me realise that my husband wasnt the person i thought he was. Thank you once again for your support and for listening to my rantings and ravings. Peace and love to you all