okay, I will tell you something good now:

life is not far away from these movies. I don't mean it in a delusional way. I am very realistic, I think. things in real life are basically the same for me than in movies. they just look a little differently because it's not played by the same actors and people in real life don't say so cheesy things and have ridiculous haircuts. but I can have the same feelings about real life as about movies.

I guess that's something good because I don't feel life is any less interesting than movies or dreams. just more physical. thanks for reminding.
hope that was any helpful to anyone.