I'm kind of embarrassed about this, but when I was a kid I spent many a night crying about how I wasn't adopted. I just didn't feel like I belonged in my family at all. I wanted to be adopted so badly because my parents were so awful that I just want to have a different set of parents who could be my "real parents." Maybe I just watched the movie Annie too much . So basically for many years I had this fantasy that I was adopted that was like my coping skill as a kid. I also remember getting really upset any time anyone ever told me I look like my parents, and I got told that a lot. I still do to this day, and it still upsets me every time it happens. When I got a bit older I also used to question my mom a lot about her past relationships hoping that I would find out I wasn't my dad's kid. I was really desperate for another family I guess. My T recently said something in session that kind of bothered me. She said, "you know if you had told anyone about this and they reported it you would have probably been taken out of your home and placed somewhere else." This really upset me because now I think I'll always have this mourning of a possible better life even though it most likely wouldn't have been better. Sorry this kind of got off topic a bit, but I guess all of this is just my rambling-venting-way of saying I relate a lot to this feeling of not belonging.