No, i'm afraid you were suggestive and highly questioning. Telling me that there's no shame in feelings, to try being deprived of affection for five years and that by stifling expression i'm putting a relationship in jeopardy. That isn't putting across a valid argument that's telling someone how to live their life. That invites defensiveness. I'm sorry this thread has gotten off track, i don't intend any further response as that would detract from OP's needs.