Ah, hi hello, I'm Syd. My current diagnosis is schizo-affective disorder, though my previous psych told me I was high functioning. My new one seems to think I'm bi-polar. I've recently switched anti-psychotics for financial reasons, and I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this one yet.
About five hours ago, I thought I should get heading to bed, but I settled down to draw for a bit because I wasn't tired enough to sleep yet. About a half an hour ago, I realized four and a half hours had passed. There were people up with me around midnight, and there's a bout of hazy memory that could account for maybe an hour after that, but the next three and a half I have absolutely no clue what happened with.
This used to happen all the time, before my last meds, and my memory's always been bad anyways, but I don't know if it's just my memory being ****** and I'm exceedingly adept at spacing out or if I'm dissociating. I remember squinting at the definition a bit when I first heard it, but I quickly forgot because I was first introduced to it in the middle of a rather engaging story and was more interested in finding out what happened than introspection. The only other context it's come up in since then is my girlfriend locking in and my friends with DID, and neither of those apply, nor did I actually remember this was a thing that happened pretty much constantly when I was younger.
The last week or so has been super down for me, if that changes anything. Like about as low as my baseline is. I came out as trans to my family and my mother's reaction has been less than ideal, and we just found out the other day that it's likely my girlfriend will need a lung transplant if she wants to live more than five years more.
I dunno, I'm so sorry for just kind of dumping this here, I just need to know if I'm being paranoid or if this is something I should attempt to schedule a psych appointment for like... tomorrow. It seemed really rude to burst in on my friends and start drilling them about their illness, so I figured this was the less harmful route? Sorry. Thank you for any help you have to offer.
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