I'm so sorry this happened to you and I hope things turn around for you. Personally, I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of offing myself! What a creep! He was no man to do that to you after 28 years of marriage. I can only suppose there was another woman and that probably feels horrible, but try to remember there is something wrong with him, you couldn't have changed anything. $1500 a month doesn't sound like much in this day and age, can you find something to supplement your income? Bury yourself in something OTHER than thoughts of him and the past. Big hug for you, wish I could be of more help.