Quote:
Originally Posted by Hellion
Well cutting family out of ones life can be easier said than done, the OP says they are this persons sister...so that is going to complicate things. One does not always have the option to simply not ever deal with people who don't treat them well even adults.....what about various employees with an ***** of a boss who aren't in a position to quit or they'd lose their house for instance?
Also I never said people should 'assume' they are powerless, especially if they aren't in that situation...but if someone does something to them that effects them negatively they shouldn't be beating themselves up over it since they cannot control other peoples actions. And its good you had the option to move out, I am sure there quite a few people who would move out of situations like that if they could. Sure fighting ones own battles is good, but sometimes people need help with those, I see nothing wrong with that....not to mention I hate how the world functions, so wouldn't bother me if it stopped functioning the way it does and improves. I get your point I just disagree with some of it I guess....people are too stuck on 'self sufficiency and act like needing help, helping others or encouraging group effort and treating each other with respect and kindness in society is a shameful thing its ridiculous. But yeah even as an adult I think if someone where to harrass or harm me in some way its effect on me is not something I need to be taking responsibility for as it doesn't have to do with wrong action/ill intentions on my part....now if I start crap and someone reacts accordingly that's different but i don't go around trying to cause trouble anyways.
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Please don't get me wrong - i never stated at any one point that bad behaviour is acceptable or that people don't deserve help, a lot of people aren't in the know or the position to resolve a situation easily - but without hope what's the point? And again it's not about taking responsibility for how others behave towards you - no one would expect that - but if you want the situation to change you have to try...whether it's getting the authorities involved, complaining to HR at work, working hard so that future independence is possible...no, not every situation is clear cut, all i was just trying to do is encourage a bit of skepticism and grey area thinking - most of us don't know the true extent of the sitautions explained to us here, so we work with what we have and hope that our suggestions spark in the very least some alternative thinking. Not everyone here can say the same thing otherwise what would be the point in contributing? It continues to be my hope that the person the OP is referring to is able to combat the situation either themselves or with help (it makes no difference) - they have a right to a better situation as does the OP.