what makes you think (except those tests which I don't recognize) that if you think you are having certain feelings you do not actually have them?
nobody knows if the feelings we have are the same other people mean by some words.

I am asking this because all this sounds too familiar to me. like there was a status of being a "human being" and "looking like human being but only pretending". I also had that idea before but I think it's wrong. I think it's very wrong!

why would you pretend something so stupid as to be in love with a girl who rejected you?
I think it ****ing hurts and you want to find a way around it. or that you are being cynical. or that you are being so cynical you don't even know it.
sometimes I think this is what depression is.

if what you say is the truth it would be the same whatever girl you meet. it wouldn't have to be her.

and of course emotion can be flattened by depression, too…

besides I will not get into a discussion about what's the difference between animals and humans (and I insist it's not that ridiculous concept of EQ). and why do you think animals don't get emotions?

okay whatever. I don't know if I can convince you of anything or if that would even help you. but I want to say that you helped me.
I am sorry you feel bad and I want you to be better. but besides that it is interesting reading what you write and a challenge for me to respond. thanks, I feel more alive now.