Quote:
Originally Posted by Brennan11007
My father is 70 years old. I am 19 years old. Can you see where this is going to end already?
My father can't decide whether to treat me as a child or an adult. He refuses to show me any respect as a human being or as his child but demands respect in return. I understand where I ****ed up in our relationship but he refuses to see how he messed up in raising me and teaching me how to be a sensible adult blaming solely my mother for not raising me right. My boyfriend of 3 years has taught me more about being a mature adult who can take care of herself than either of my parents combined. I raised myself and I don't necessarily want a relationship with either of my parents but I am forced to because of my situation. I consider myself to be very reasonable and am willing to sit down and talk without swearing or yelling but can't have that behavior reciprocated.
Let's just say, my boyfriend of 3 years told me he was proud of me before my father or my mother.
How do I have a civil conversation with someone who can't see me as a person who he can talk to without deciding I have to do it or see it one way because I am his child and I have to do what he says just because.
I really need some advice from some level headed people who can see my situation. Maybe I could even explain this to my father which I have attempted to many times but won't listen. Maybe with the right words, he might listen to the conversation in a whole instead of the words and meanings he wants to hear.
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I had the same EXACT problem with my father, but I'm 22 and he was 50, and had terminal cancer, just recently passed away. Mqy mother is schizophrenic and attemted murder on myqq half sister when she was 3. What I can say is you'll more than likely never get over it enough to forgive him completely in due time. I had to do the same thing you did, raise ypurself, pay a his bills at a young age...etc. really as corny as it sounds just take each day as it comes, I never made amends with mine, and unfortunately it was bad enough to where I don't really know if I regret it or not. But I hope you're not at that point and if you are I truly a understand ( I mean this was a man that yelled at me over the phone while I was being induced with my first child). But hang tight and just treat every little situation seperately, Im sorry but I'm a realist and at this stage in the game it more than likely wnot be fully resolved. I'm sorry you had to go through it too.