I have felt this way before. I don't want to think about it bc it would probably trigger feeling depressed again. I've recently been doing well because of quotes I read and I also did a course on an app called Happier and it really helped me see my worth and that I am fine just the way I am. I do feel hopeless quite often and I don't WANT to but it happens. I am just trying to have hope and believe that I am worthy of everything good.