I'm new to the site, forgive me if I'm posting this in the wrong place or breaking any sort of rules. I recently submitted the following to 'ask' but now realize I may have just wasted someone's time who could have been helping those who need it far more than I.

I can't seem to get rid of feelings for my best friend. We've known each other for almost 6 years now. Around the time we first met we tried dating, which didn't work out.
I broke up with her and we remained friends. 2-3 years later we both ended up moving across the country to the same place, same school, only blocks away from each other. We tried dating
again which resulted in her breaking up with me, as she found it difficult to see me as more than her best friend. I never really got over her from then on. She's dated twice since, both times I noticed
how I wasn't too happy for her, and that it bothered me. Now, about a year later it's far worse. She's by all means the most important thing in my life, thinking of ever leaving her hurts me. All of my biggest fears
relate to losing her in some way. All of my plans in life include her, and recently all of my dreams at night are about her.
I see her every day. We talk every day. Our families are so close we're almost considered siblings.
She says she sees me as a brother, but I know that's not true. Almost our entire humor consists of inside jokes
and code-words relating to being with each other either sexually or romantically. (When alone she jokes about it far more.)
When asked by others if we're into each other, I joke around with it while she denies it immediately and becomes irritable. From an outside perspective we seem by all means a couple. But every time
I joke about or bring up us being anything more than best friends, she seems grossed out or disappointed that I would even think about it.
She likely doesn't know I still have any feelings for her (she may assume I have a small crush, I'm not sure), as our sense of humor and my actions correlate rather well. When I try to spend less time with her, I end
up hanging out with her anyways or the feelings I have return
as soon as I see her again. I've tried finding something or someone to distract me from thoughts about her to no avail. I feel like I'm stuck with these feelings that I can't ever tell her about.
I'm afraid it could damage our friendship, despite her telling me she doesn't care about how I feel about her, as long as I'm still in her life. I'm afraid once I tell her, it will become a real truth
and I'll never be able to get over it, If I ever could anyways. I've started loosing sleep and concentration over her. The few friends that know about this have run out of ideas or are
telling me to talk to her about it. I feel like I may become depressed over this and I can't stand the guilty feeling I have when I'm around her.
It's very unlikely that we won't be seeing a lot of each other for the rest of our lives and I have a responsibility to protect her from everything I can, including my own feelings. I love her, and don't ever want to put her through a situation where her best friend
isn't what she thought I was. How do I get over this? Or how do I better keep this to myself? I've considered telling her, but I think more bad could come from that than good.