Need advice ..........a good one ........please help if u can

Hello sorry about the grammar and structure dyslexic

I am bi polar manic depressive adhd dyslexic ..........I knew this at the age of 12 and they started the pills........over time the pills effect wore off they increased them to a toxic point in my system and I adjusted again to them

since I was 15 I have smoked because it is the one thing that works it levels me out keeps me calm ( I can go out in public not be freaked out or a zombie ) I am 35 now in a manic high (I went out for my first time this year to my favorite place Ren fair I got ****** drunk ....I had a DD.....but a buddy gave me a vape pen from Denver they are like e-cigs but with THC and CBDs plus 64 other active chemicals) ......well I offered it to a undercover dea agent so now I am facing 5 years in prison ....I was trying to be a nice guy and share what someone gave me as a thank u now I am facing prison

so I am freaking the hell out I got rid of all my stuff and trying to start seeing the doctors again (turn back into a pill zombie) but I have no choice the state I live in does not see it as a medical treatment for any of the stuff only dying ppl and cancer ..............leaving is no longer a choice with this charge over my head and smoking is no longer a choice I can afford anymore

So here my sets of ?s please weight in
1 should I commit myself and have them start messing with the doses and pills like that or should I go for outpatient treatment (this will be 2 weeks at least before can do......hospital gave me something really strong until I can ) ........insurance is just going active so have to wait
2 should I tell the doctors the blunt truth that the pills they put me on do not work ........they will alter the pills to something stronger and I am a bigger zombie
3 should I ask to be permit committed for the rest of my life as my choice always seem to get me in deep trouble with the world I live in
4 at this point it has been 23 years of crap...should I ask them to ECT my brain fry out all those old form ones and see if the new ones allow me to live normal
5 are there any major new pills for bi polar or is it all the same zombie inducing stuff .........is there something i should ask to try

Last bit of history.....Been in a mental ward for 9 months ......done all kinds of treatments and therapies.......been in trouble most of my life and know the court system well from my impulsive acts (as u can see with what got me to this point) but i never done anything to harm anyone

i used spell check on Microsoft word....my responses will be worst .....thanks for the help....op please allow this or tell me what i need to change to get some help