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Rayne Selene
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Member Since Mar 2014
Location: United States
Posts: 263
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Angry Oct 19, 2014 at 03:16 PM
 
My parents got divorced two years ago. I moved back in for two reasons: to help out my mom and to save money while I go to college. I'm having a really hard time with my relationship with my mother. After two years she still goes on and on, daily, about how she's alone and how much she hates her life. I try to sympathize, I try to support her, I try to help her with my siblings (ages 16 and 13) and with finances, but really I just don't know how to help. She's at a point where she's obviously very depressed and doesn't want to do things anymore. She refuses to deal with my sister and brother. She won't eat healthy. And then when I try to step in, try to help with running the house, she loses it with me. Today she screamed at me for half an hour because I "walked past" something that needed to be done (moving chairs from the living room back into the kitchen after the floor had been mopped) and about how I never do anything to help around the house and that I think everything can just be left to her. At the moment she was yelling, I had just washed/put away all the dishes, made lunch for the family, and was folding laundry. I work seven days a week. I've been struggling with bipolar disorder and new medication. I go to school full time and I have straight A's. I'm trying to get into graduate school and I'm studying for the GRE. And all the while I'm trying to eat healthy, exercise, and pay for school. I can't deal with my mother's emotional needs and mood swings on top of all of this. She wants to treat me like an equal one day so that I can listen to all her emotional problems and give advice, and the next day I'm thirteen again and she's doling out chores like I'm a kid. I help her handle everything. I cook dinner. I remind her to update her registration on her car. I help her with bills. I have to step in with my siblings because she "just can't do it." But then she wants to turn around and yell that she's in charge of this house and I need to respect her and it's just confusing and hurtful! I do respect her. I just don't even know what to do. I don't feel like an adult child living at home is just a child to be ordered around. I do my best, but she doesn't see that. I'm not financially able to be on my own right now; I could move out, but I'd have to drop out of school. I just don't know what to do, any advice would really be appreciated. I'm really angry and frustrated, and at the same time I know she's working hard and is sad and frustrated too. But why is it that I'm the one who ends up handling everything for her???????
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