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Old Oct 20, 2014, 09:31 AM
Can't Stop Crying's Avatar
Can't Stop Crying Can't Stop Crying is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2011
Location: missing
Posts: 6,693
These links have some great ideas that are more specific to neglected/abused children rather than just general parenting guidelines...tried to copy + paste some of the highlights...the formatting doesn't match

https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/parenting_CAN.pdf

Kempe Family Resources and Tips

https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/f_abused/f_abused.pdf

http://www.aap.org/en-us/advocacy-an...ilyHandout.pdf

Quote:
Usual parenting practices may not work. So, be careful! First, know and respect that your child may perceive and respond to the world in ways that you do not....

TIPS

Learn to notice and avoid (or lessen) “triggers.” Find out what distracts or makes your child anxious. Work to lessen these things.

Set up a routine for your child so she knows what to expect.

Give your child a sense of control. Give simple choices.

Respect your child’s decisions.

Do not take your child’s behaviors personally.

Try to stay calm. Find ways to respond to outbursts that do not make things worse. Lower your voice. Do not yell or show aggression. Do not stare or look directly at your child for too long. Some children see this as a threat.

When your child keeps you at a distance, stay available and responsive.

When you can, stay away from discipline that uses physical punishment. For a child who was abused, this may cause panic and out-of-control behavior.

Let your child feel the way she feels. Teach your child words to describe her feelings. Show acceptable ways for her to deal with feelings. Then, praise her for expressing her feelings or calming down.

Be patient. It may have taken years of trauma or abuse to get the child in his current state of mind. Learning to trust again is not likely to happen overnight—or any time soon.

Be consistent, predictable, caring, and patient.

Teach your child that others can be trusted to stay with him and help him.

Ask for help when you have concerns, questions, or are struggling. There are proven therapies to help children and parents adjust to trauma’s
effects. You do not have to do this by yourself
I understand these are so much easier said than done....I believe in you and I know you are strong!
__________________

Children's talent to endure stems from their ignorance of alternatives.
~ Maya Angelou


Thank you SadNEmpty for my avatar and signature.
Thanks for this!
shezbut, unaluna