I'm not sure if this is the place to criticize 12 step groups, I'm sure this can be moved, if need be.

I was involved with a rather strange one for several years. I saw a counselor, who referred me to a pastor who ran a small group. The pastor claimed it was a 12 step group, and did talk about some of the concepts and the 12 steps, but he also set himself up as the leader and never talked about his own problems, but rather encouraged us to talk about ours, and then let us know what he thought.

He was fond of saying "you're only as sick as your secrets" and that was intended to be motivation for us to talk about ours... apparently it didn't apply to him.

His worst quality was that he would talk about other members when they weren't there. I called him out on that one. I don't think he liked me very much.

So, imagine a group of 5-7 guys all sitting in a room with a manipulative pastor who apparently thought he was in a superior position and able to help us, while claiming it was a 12-step group.

I'm trying to remember just why it was I stuck around for so long. I found out later that the church he pastors is one of those young-earth-creationist types.