Empowering, we do have choices as adults. It took me some time to learn this. As a child I was victimized, I do not have to submit to anyone anymore. I choose to submit at times to my husband, professors, therapist, and even clients. I do however have a choice and do not have to submit if it would make me a victim. I fully reconize I am coming from a place of privilege in saying this, as a upper middle class white female, but I have a decision in what I do for work, who I spend my time with, what I study, and where I live.