A lot of this could be aggravated depression. I know when I'm agitated I want nothing to do with my family or sex, unless it's a means to intentionally physically hurt the person. I often wish my husband's meds killed his sex drive. It's good that you found a temporary solution to keep your kids from your negative mood. but it's a
temporary solution. I don't believe in souls but you obviously care or you wouldn't be concerned. Are you in therapy? Have you talked to your therapist?
BPD criteria
Quote:
Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment. [Not including suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in Criterion 5]
A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation.
Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.
Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (e.g., spending, promiscuous sex, eating disorders, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating). [Again, not including suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in Criterion 5]
Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or self-mutilating behavior.
Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days)
Chronic feelings of emptiness.
Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights).
Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.
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__________________
Dx:
Me- SzA
Husband- Bipolar 1
Daughter- mood disorder+
Comfortable broken and happy
"So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk
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