I hate to say it, but perhaps karma is coming to bite you in the arse for your passive acceptance of the stigma of mental illness? Just a thought..... As in, don't eff with karma, she can be a real b****.

I see a lot of your posts and they seem to border on obsessive, perhaps just very repetitive. The same sorts of ideas going round and round and round in your head. Its exhausting to read it all, so It must also be exhausting to live in your head. Are you doing any sort of therapy which addresses these thoughts? CBT perhaps? Throw in a sprinkle of radical acceptance? (OK, in this case throw in the whole dang bottle of radical acceptance...)