Wow - I know exactly what you mean with the not wanting to go to sleep, but I've never heard anyone else say it before. In my case, I am extremely overworked - I often work until close to midnight. I should be dying to sleep after that, but I often find myself staying up much later than I should because I know that as soon as I wake up in the morning, it's all going to start again. Those last few hours post-working and pre-sleeping seem to be the only ones I have in which I can truly relax a little, but it's really wrecking my health not getting enough sleep.

And I too feel like I've wasted my youth. I also live alone, in a rented space, have no friends where I live, and just basically miss the days when I actually used to have fun and not feel so dead inside. I don't know if those good feelings will ever come back, and it's scary to think of living the rest of my life like this. I look around at other people who are married, have kids, have lives, and I don't know what I did so wrong to wind up like this.