Few friends if any outside wife's side of the family. Do not see my side of the family (seldom) because many years ago, I was chief of the ***** hole club. Didn't get told until after 60 I was BP. Now, and always I'm sure, just was not comfortable meeting new people. Before medicine, I could be mowing the yard while the whole time I am dwelling over my family and what they think of me, and are they trying to harm me in in some way. Like brother and sister out to get me. Own property together which can be a problem with many such siblings. Think I own the responsibility for screwing things up. Recently told two friends I was BP. Would never do that again. In my opinion most of the general public have zero idea what it is like to be mentally ill. At least I read about that, and only now studies being done about that now. Study I read said mentally ill have two hard realities to deal with. One is their mental illness, and the other is how the public judges them. Many people do not want to have anything to do with mental illness.