P { margin-bottom: 0.08in; } This is getting ridiculous – I KNOW I have issues both psychologically, and medically, BUT nothing at all is REALLY getting solved no matter what. And to just say forget it (like I tried to do) no one will leave me alone about it. But to do things “there way” make me totally miserable because I end up with loss of privacy, breaking things that were fine before taking your drugs, or feeling like I got someone looking over my shoulder all the time – NONE of that will do period – I NEED EVERYTHING working at least as well as it did before you started (and I DO NOT play the trade game, so you CAN NOT hand me anything like “o.k. so now you are impotent, but your anxiety is nonresistant” just won't float because regardless of how well it help one problem, you cause something else that was not there before – and that is all I have to see to not want anything to do with that.
The Privacy has ALWAYS been EXTREAMELY important to me – especial when it comes to anything medical, pretty much if it goes beyond MY doctors, I WILL reject it, and same goes for if I am going to end up being watched closer if you give me something than I would be if I do not accept it – because in that case – I an going to go for the option that leave me not being watched any closer. And even going through school – the ONLY why I would take anything at school was if it was done with complete disregard for there regulations that said it had to be the school nurse giving it one – my deal was it stays with me – and I decide when to take it, and no one at the school even knows of it – as soon as they did – I discontinued use without saying anything even to the guy that prescribed it – any did not care what it was for. Secondly, unless YOU PERSONALLY are treating something – none of that is any of your business anyway, I I have carried that thinking (I' in my mid 40s now) and to this day would rather not work then allow an employer to have ANY medical info – and that includes your so called “standard” drug test – what I have in my body again totally between me and MY doctors – if an employer is going to push it that much – I just don't want to sell him ANY of my time PERIOT.
I guess I could say me caring so much about stuff like that when most people don't is a problem – but IF that is the case there is no way to get anywhere without dealing with that first – and that's a non-starter if you start by; taking away even a tiny bit of privacy, breaking anything, or making me feel like you are watching closer than before I bothered.
All that even prevents me from entering any building that dose any screening of what you have on you in any way – pat-down, x-ray, even a mettle detector is an ABSOLUTE no no – I just WILL NOT go in if you are going to do that END OF STORY. And I know it's not a big deal, lots of people do it every day – but don't you see, the whole thing with any search of any kind regardless of anything means you suspect something – that being the case – if you can not at least say why you think it's me – buzz of – that's it!
Yes there are a lot of issues, and none are really any fun, but you start that and you just aggravate the anxiety ( big part of it is over privacy issues – and in fact have had attacks over a traffic light camera – and that's why if I know one exists, I WILL avoid that intersection – and have recently started finding ways to get most places using only side roads with only signs for traffic control) – but no I did not think I'm just paranoid because I really am losing that stuff – was Osama Bin Ladden being paranoid if he said the whole wold was out to get him? - NO – Because they were!
Now I do agree that something has got to give, but so far the only options I have seen is causing medical issues where they were none, worsening others, and the darn privacy again.
And to do things “there way” STILL dose not really get what I am after a lot of times. It just so happens I have urine retention issues too – but instead of tying to make the bladder drain completely, the concentration was or holding it in, to extract with a cathitor, I cut that off because I look at that as worsting something – the point was to not need a cathitor so if you don't eliminate that, your not helping.
I also have got to have some sort of a say in that sort of a thing or I won't have anything to do with it. Right now Ebola has been a big discussion – have no clue why, I have only heard of 2 actual confirmed cases here – but that's beside the point. I have done nothing to be at any piticular risk – but still right now if I did sow any symptoms at all, I most likely would NOT say anything to anyone because now only certain hospitals are designated to treat it, ant the one I would use for anything else is not on that list, one that is I already have had problems with – and because of that, the others on that list are out because I know nothing about them, plus none of my own doctors have any privileges at them – so, again not interested in even knowing if I did have that, because if the test did come up positive, there goes a lot of choice, so – regardless of what symptoms are showing, just leave it alone.
But in any case – bottom line, I have said all this, and still no one will leave me alone, but they can't seem to tell me what I can do that dose not violate any of my criteria so............I just don't know......