Quote:
Originally Posted by Zwangsstörung
"And I happen to meet a girl who wants me to have sex with her from before the first date, when I would have prefered to getting to know each other the better. How can somebody live so against the current? (I'm talking about me)."
I'm pretty much the same way, I think. I have intimacy issues, too. Anxiety and OCD just murder sexual stuff, but I've been able to make do, to a point, in the past - as long as I feel comfortable and trusting with someone, then it tends to be OK, as long as my anxiety/OCD is kicking up a real fuss. I've been also been single for quite a while, but at least you've had some sort of intimacy.
I think you need to work on yourself, get some professional help, before thinking of relationships; that's kinda what I've been doing. Now I'm in college, working out a ton, living in a new place on my own, getting support in life, and now it seems I may be getting a warehouse job (which could later develop into "IT Technician") which is ideal for me.
|
Thank you, and sorry, and I don't mean to justify myself... but it's not I'm some sort of basket case who need therapy immediatly. I've just been under a lot of stress and anxiety lately, and being with the not-so-right person just triggered that reaction. I felt pushed and put to test. I guess anyone could have reacted the same way.
Having something else to do with your life besides a relationship (I mean, either in one or not) is such a big deal. I appreciate that advice.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hvert
It sounds like perhaps she pushed the physical intimacy too quickly and you went ahead with emotional intimacy before she was ready.
Like you said, there are so many women out there who share these feelings about not being intimate too quickly. I would look for someone who is more compatible on a basic level going forward.
Who knows, maybe it will work out with this one? If you both only have a week invested in it, it is not much to lose if not.
|
Yes, in hindsight, I did felt pushed.
Maybe were just not compatible.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hannabee
WOW have things ever changed and maybe not for the good. In my day, any woman having sex after a week was considered a slut...maybe a bit too harsh, but if you think about it, sex is very intimate and requires giving and sharing of oneself, physically and emotionally, and IMHO, not something to be taken lightly. I doubt you can really reach any level of intimacy after one week.
I think you knew this deep down and that was one of the reasons you could not perform. The crying about it, maybe a manifestation of "disappointment" in this choice of a partner? Sounds like she is a game player, so unless you are a "player" why stick with it. Move on and choose wiser next time.
Go ahead you all can call me OLD FASHIONED, I really don't care LOL
|
In that case, I'm old fashioned too. Absolutely.
I agree 100%