Sabby, I really thought I would improve on how my parents raised me, but I found myself falling into the same patterns like they were hard wired in.
You can plant seeds in the children, but when they are grown it is time for them to tend their own garden, weed it, water it and plant and nurture the seeds that are nearest and dearest to their hearts.
If nothing else raising a child has taught me humility and self acceptance of my limitations and acknowledgements of my talents. I hope you can be at peace with the difficult task of raising children.