so i just watched an episode of criminal minds i dvr'd from two or three weeks ago. a serial killer who had been abused by his father as a boy was killing fathers who were abusing their kids in a number of different ways.this show brought out a number of different feelings for me. i must admit that i kind of got a thrill and was sort of cheering him on when he was murdering people being the victim of an abusive father. and i was really sad and felt so much compassion for the guy because he had all these voices chanting over and over in his head. i know how difficult that is. i know that doesn't excuse murder but then i wonder where my mental illness is going to drive me in the future. could i go crazy like this? i mean, i have the potential to totally lose it too, right? then a second storyline has a guy on death row. they strap him and in inject him and all i could think was i would trade places with him easily given a choice, to have it all over that quick, so easily and painlessly. and i have been doing well, yet i would still leave given a choice. i just had to get all this out to process it....i don't get to see t for a while yet.......