I've been married for 20 yrs. We have 3 small children. We're both in our mid to late 40's, we had children 11 yrs into our marriage so I guess we're "old."
I've had trouble w/severe depression w/psy behavior, csa, SI since I was a teenager. PTSD in the past 2 yrs & just had a recent od attempt 2 months ago. So now you have background.

My question seems simple...to me. When I say something serious, something that can be provoking that I'd like to discuss or get feedback on or something negative when I'm depressed, to my H, I keep getting the same answers. They are:
"Well, Patagonia, I don't know how to answer that." Or
"Well, Patagonia, how would you like me to answer that."

What I hear is, " these are stupid thoughts, (heavy sigh) I don't wanto talk about it bec it's hard, & I know it'll upset you, it's upsetting me, so I don't wanto bother w/a conversation w/you. Please stop. This has gone on for over 20 yrs, I'm really tired of it. Can't you get better by now & be normal."

So I feel shot down, rejected & asked not to discuss my feelings. I know it does upset him. He just says he doesn't know what to say, but gee after 20 yrs I thought by now he'd have some idea.
I think he tired. Very tired of me & extremely tired of my illness. He has mentioned a couple of times that he'd like the "old" me to come back to the family.
I feel like I have no one. I thought I could always turn to him for help, that he'd be there for me. Now I feel abandoned.