Musica

welcome to psych central. one of the things I do when I see a new name here is check out their profile and other posts so that my posts do not go contradicting their own treatment providers treatment plans...

I see you have been diagnosed with Complex PTSD (suggestion you might want to contact your treatment providers to update your diagnostic label, last spring many diagnostic labels have been changed/discontinued/ absorbed into other mental disorder diagnostic. Complex PTSD is a label that has been discontinued due to other mental disorders now contain the diagnostic criteria of what used to be called complex PTSD, updating your diagnostics can help you to get more treatment options that can help the problem you posted about)

I also see in your other posts that you are on anxiety medications and are sensative to side effects....sometimes medication side effects are things like doing things you dont remember doing. my suggestion here is that you might want to contact the person that is prescribing your medications so that they can assess whether the medications are causing this problem, whether the dosage is too high or wrong kind for your body.

You said you have always had dissociation problems but its gotten worse...one thing about dissociation is its a reaction to things...kind of like if someone says something you dont like you in turn feel angry/hurt or humiliated... the saying something you dont like is the trigger and the feeling angry/hurt humiliated is the reaction...

in order for dissociation to get worse something has to happen (a trigger) to cause your body to dissociate (reaction) Find that trigger and then you can control the reaction.

this is where having your diagnosis updated can help... with dissociation the way to control the reaction is called grounding (some people call this self care, self nurturing, breathing, meditation, mindfulness....there are many words for this). Some (but not all) medical plans will pay for treatment options that teach these things like yoga, depression management classes, Anxiety management classes, treatment facilities that work with people with dissociative problems.....

theres also many great books out there for learning how to relax, you will find them in your library under the labling of self help, mindfulness, relaxation,....

but over all how a person learns to relax is by doing something they enjoy. my way to relax is rowing my canoe around the lake, painting and spending time with my wife and children.

I do have problems with dissociative disorders/dissociative symptoms. how I handle them depends upon other accompanying symptoms /why they are happening. ie if the problem is getting worse with me its usually a medication problem. once my medications have been adjusted Im free of the problems.