Yes, I look at them as poison. I also know that I have never been able to pull myself out of a deep dive without them, or settle down from ups that have caused havoc. And my cycles are too long to wait out. This last one has been more than a year and I tried everything in the book to rally without meds.

Even knowing all this, I am still trying to build up alternative supports to one day replace meds or at least reduce them. I hope that I am wise enough that, if I do go off meds, I recognize the signs and get back on them before I let it get this far again. Even my naturopath, who specializes in mental health, says that nothing she does can work as quickly and effectively as medication; but, in the long run, what she does may be able to replace them. We'll see. There are no easy answers and everyone is so very different in how she responds.